Great Awakening 2.0

God decides when there will be an outpouring of his Holy Spirit. Nobody “schedules” the Holy Spirit. Nobody scheduled Pentecost, or the Great Awakening of the 1700s, or the Jesus People Movement. Nevertheless, world revival has been scheduled for tomorrow night, August 30.

Michael W. Smith feels God has called him to spearhead the next Great Awakening, and he found an available date. What form will it take? It’ll be “a massive concert in Nashville, Tennessee, which he believes will be the beginning of the next great awakening throughout the U.S. and the world,” according to the Christian Post.

That concert will be held tomorrow night, August 30, at Bridgestone Arena in Nashville. Smith points out that the name “Bridgestone” is significant, since both “bridge” and “stone” are “instrumental” in the Bible. Plus, there’s a big antenna atop the arena. “Is that coincidence?” he says. Sounds like a foolproof fleece to me.

Smith has partnered with TBN (Trinity Broadcasting Network) to bring to us, in living color, the next Great Awakening. It, obviously, must occur in the United States and be sponsored by Caucasians, like Jesus was. Legitimate revivals don’t occur in countries which aren’t Blessed by Gaaawd.

Says Smith, “Other than Jerusalem, I think there’s something very strategic about Nashville.” It’s unclear if the Holy Spirit was given any other venue options for this “next great move of God.” If Jerusalem is Number 1 on the list, why settle for second best?

Sorry, but you can’t experience revival live. This is a tape-delay revival.

The concert will be taped and then aired sometime during the fall by TBN. So if the Holy Spirit descends on that gathering tomorrow night, I’m not sure what’s supposed to happen–bottle him up until the fall broadcast date? Digitally record the Holy Spirit onto a DVD? I’m sure the technicians at TBN have it all figured out, and will remaster the Holy Spirit’s Outpouring in a cutting-edge way. I assume you’ll be able to buy the Great Awakening on DVD.

Silliness aside, you can’t schedule a Great Awakening. You can’t even schedule Woodstock, not with the magic. You can only schedule a bunch of recording artists for a Thursday night gig. But I’m sure it’ll be a very worshipful event with a lot of good music, and somebody will make some money.

As for me and Pam: we’ll be in Shipshewana at a Three Dog Night concert. With Jeremiah singin’ Joy to the World.

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