For all of us whose homes are not usually tidy and ready for unexpected visitors: here’s one I’ve never thought of using. It comes from the late great Phyllis Diller: “If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet them with, ‘Who could have done this? We have no enemies.'” Diller, of course, is more famous for the line, “Housework won’t kill you, but then again, why take the chance?” (With apologies to Mom.)