Louisville gave coach Rick Pitino an extra $150,000 for winning the national championship. His players, of course, had a role in making that bonus possible. But from what I understand of NCAA rules, he can’t even buy his players a Coke.
Hunter Organization Likes Background Checks
Good piece on Politico by Gaspar Perricone, head of Bull Moose Sportsmen, an organization of hunters. He wrote in favor of universal background checks. Some points:
- A poll of their organization showed 72% support universal background checks, with exemptions for some sales between private individuals.
- 84% of their members oppose an assault weapons ban.
- “We believe background checks fall within an ethic of responsible gun ownership sportsmen have been living and teaching for generations.”
- “Aside from reasonable exceptions, like giving a gun to a family member or sharing a gun on a hunting trip, every person buying a gun in America should go through a background check. Private sellers and buyers can go to a gun dealer to process the checks and an online site to process checks should be explored.”
- “For all checks, licensed dealers should keep a record of the sale. This is merely an extension of the existing system that has been in place and has worked well for the last twenty years….Dealer record-keeping ensures checks are being done and aids law enforcement in tracking guns used in crimes.”
- “Felons, domestic abusers, and the seriously mentally ill should not have access to guns.”
- “Three out of four hunters we surveyed believe we can protect our Second Amendment rights while making it more difficult for criminals to get guns. A background check is the best method to prevent dangerous people from getting them, and a licensed dealer record is how we prosecute those that commit crimes with guns.”
- “Our support for a background check for all gun sales does not mean we support a government firearm registry of any type. We do not. The gun checks bill proposed in Congress does not and will not create a registry. The law already ensures that only dealers keep a record – and that all federal records for background checks are destroyed within 24 hours.”
A Fashion Idea Ahead of Its Time
I’m surprised this jumpsuit idea from the 70s never caught on. Doesn’t this powder-blue outfit make this apparent lumberjack look totally manly?
Namesakes from the Zombie Apocalypse
I suspect that, in six years, kindergarten teachers will find a surprising number of kids with the names Michonne, Daryl, and Carl. All three are warriors, and somewhat Eastwoodesque in being killers with few words.
I am, of course, referring to characters in AMC’s “The Walking Dead,” a show Pam and I really enjoy.
Those three characters have emerged as distinctive and un-psycho. Merle, Shane, and the Governor are distinctive, but not guys you’d take home to Momma. Most of the women characters are just annoying (Lori, Maggie, Andrea) or invisible (Carol, Beth).
The old guys tend to be likable and sane–Hershel, Dale–but I don’t see parents naming kids after them. Glenn is coming into his own. Rick–I don’t know. He needs to come out of his funk, and it looks like that may be happening.
But Carl, especially with that great hat, is developing into a great character–kind of Eastwoodesque, a killer with very few lines. Daryl has always been a great character. And Michonne ia kick-butt samurai warrior. And Eastwoodesque too, now that I think of it.
I was happy to see Morgan appear in a late-season episode. I’m wondering if he’ll be sticking around. He could be an interesting guy to have around.
Not So Social
A PiperJaffrey survey shows young people are losing interest in Facebook, as they are in other social media–Twitter, YouTube, Google+, Flickr, and Tumblr. Ten percent fewer teens regard Facebook as their “most important” social media site. The hardest hit sites are the ones built around a personal profile and a set structure. Messaging services seem to be filling the void.
Catholics – Transcending Politics
If I may speak in generalities: American Christians mistakenly try to make all of their views fit whichever political party they prefer.
If Republican, they buy the whole package–against abortion, gay rights, affirmative action, immigration reform, gun restrictions, and new taxes, and in favor of the death penalty and a family life amendment.
If Democrat, they favor green energy, helping the poor, taxing the wealthy, reproductive rights, alternative lifestyles, marriage equality, healthcare reform, and various kinds of government intervention.
Again: generalities. I don’t know why Christians feel compelled to support the entire agenda of their preferred political party, but that’s what you usually see.
I do know a number of evangelicals whose views cross party lines. I enjoy engaging in discussions with them. It’s refreshing. They stake out their positions based FIRST on what the Bible tells them, rather than on what they hear from voices in the political world. They make up their own minds. I feel like I’m talking to THEM, instead of arguing with Sean Hannity or Lawrence O’Donnell.
But when you hold a mixture of liberal and conservative views, it makes people’s heads explode, because they can’t categorize you according to American political divisions. But, as I maintain with annoying frequency, that’s how a Christian should be. We’re not supposed to conform to the patterns of this world, political or otherwise.
With that in mind–kudos to the Catholic church. They hold “conservative” views on some issues, like sexuality, marriage, bioethics, public education, and the role of women. And they hold “liberal” views on other issues, like immigration, the death penalty, nuclear disarmament, and economic regulation. Their views exist outside of American political categories.
I don’t agree with all of the “official” Catholic views. But they take their cues from what they believe God wants, not from pundits or political platforms or what is culturally popular. I admire that.
iPotty: an Idea Whose Time has Come
The incredible iPotty sells for $39.99 on Amazon, but is currently out-of-stock at Amazon. Apparently, hordes of parents with iPads are also potty training their children (if a friend or coworker has a baby, I suggest you NOT borrow their iPad). The iPotty introduces toddlers to the wonderful world of multitasking–in this case, using the iPad to accomplish productive things while simultaneously learning to…you know. Children can even check Wikipedia for learning tips. Assuming your 18-month-old can read.
Before buying something, I always read the Amazon reviews. Very helpful stuff. But the comments with the iPotty took things to a whole new level, as some folks really had fun with this. Here are some reprinted comments from Amazon.
My kid Tobby is 13, but he has the mind, size, and appearance of a five-year-old so, we bought him the CTA Digital 2-in-1 iPotty because we were tired of sending him outside to do his business every time he started whining and scratching the front door. Now I don’t want to give the impression that my kid is stupid; I mean, he had the ability to learn the whining and door scratching trick from the dog, and unlike the dog he has never gone on the carpet. Okay, I can’t really be sure he hasn’t gone on the carpet because there’s been some presents left behind that contain corn and I don’t think any of our dog food has corn in it, but I digress.
I know we’re supposed to interact with our kid and teach him things, but quite honestly, it’s easier just to put him in front of the TV and let those cartoons do the educating for us. The kid goes into a zone when he’s watching TV and doesn’t say a word for hours, so he’s obviously learning a ton of stuff. When the iPad came out, I was reluctant to fork out all that cash, but once my wife and I realized the educational benefits it could have on our child, we bought it immediately. He has absolutely no idea how to operate the darn thing, but when he’s playing with the iPad it’s like we don’t even have a kid anymore. It’s pretty great. When you think about it, a kid playing with an iPad on the potty is no different than an adult reading a book. Sometimes you just need to take your mind off the task at hand and let things happen naturally. While our boy has yet to be successfully potty trained, we’re confident that — with the help of the iPotty — we’ll have this thing figured out in no time.
I bought this and tried it out to make sure it was suitable for our 11-year-old (he does things at his own pace). The problem — I tried it for too long and operant conditioned myself. Now I can’t relieve myself unless I am playing Angry Birds or watching Netflix. This is awkward at the office and at urinals in general. Also, whenever I am someplace without a wi-fi signal, I become constipated.
I bought this for myself because, let’s face it, I’m a busy lady on the “go” (pun intended!) and I don’t always have time to properly do my business when there is so much internetting to be done. Fortunately, I was blessed with a pretty minuscule frame and some freakish flexibility, so I am able to mount this sucker like a barely-oversized toddler. At first, I found myself only using time-wasting apps like Flow or Fruit Ninja. Then, as my restroom visits lengthened, I realized that we had some serious multi-tasking opportunities here. In the past week, I have edited my NaNoWriMo novel, stalked my ex-boyfriend (whose new wife, by the way, is hideous… but at least she’s tall, right, Rich?!), filled out my passport application – AND PRINTED IT! FROM MY BATHROOM! – and completed an online mobile app development class. And I’ve never been more regular! The only downside I can see is that now, every time I try to use my iPad in a non-water-closeted venue, I experience the sudden and undeniable urge to eliminate waste. It makes my normal bedtime routine pretty uncomfortable, and makes me feel weak for my Pavlovian response. I’m trying to taper off using this, but now a regular toilet just feels so high. There is a reason most of the world squats, people! It’s better for you!
Made in China…but Not for a Chinese Company
You own gobs of products made in China. But can you name one Chinese brand? According to one survey, 94% of Americans can’t.
There’s Lenova, the consumer electronics company. And tech people are probably familiar with Baidu, the Chinese counterpart to Google. But that’s about it.
The graphic above shows the top 50 Chinese brands. I’ve only heard of a couple of them. But then, they exist in a market of 1.4 billion people, so there’s not much need to reach out to someone living in Indiana.
But Chinese people are well aware of non-Chinese brands (Apple, Microsoft, western auto companies, fashion brands, etc.), and with their newfound wealth, are fixated on brands as status symbols. Not that Americans would ever think of doing that.
No Relief for Squeezed Travelers
Delta Airlines has designed smaller bathrooms which enable them to cram four more seats onto their 737-900 planes. Always in search of ways to make their customers happy. I’m sure they also increased the amount of overhead carry-on storage.
Eventually, I predict, airlines will entirely eliminate restrooms. You’ll use an app and wifi to remotely eliminate waste, sending it directly from your body to a waste bin in the bowels of the plane. No more of this hardwired nonsense.
The Indestructible Chuck Norris
I recently discovered the world of Chuck Norris jokes. There are many websites devoted to them (just search for “Chuck Norris jokes”). Not really jokes. Rather, statements about his awesomeness. His omnipotence. Here are some of my favorites.
- When the Boogeyman goes to sleep at night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris’ tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
- Chuck Norris can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
- Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.
- Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks don’t really kill people. They wipe out their entire existence from the space-time continuum.
- There are no races, only countries of people Chuck Norris has beaten to different shades of black and blue.
- When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
- Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
- Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
- Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
- When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
- Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the “Circle of Life.”
- Ninjas want to grow up to be just like Chuck Norris. But usually they grow up just to be killed by Chuck Norris.
- Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
- Chuck Norris eats black holes. They taste like chicken.
- “Brokeback Mountain” is what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard.
- The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
- The square root of Chuck Norris is pain.
- Chuck Norris has to register every part of his body as a separate lethal weapon. His spleen is considered a concealed weapon in over 50 states.
- They were going to release a Chuck Norris edition of Clue, but the answer always turns out to be “Chuck Norris. In The Library. With a Roundhouse Kick.”
- Chuck Norris’ pulse is measured on the richter scale.
- Chuck Norris can jump-start a car using jumper cables attached to his nipples.
- Chuck Norris makes onions cry.
- Chuck Norris doesn’t breathe, he holds air hostage
- If Chuck Norris is running late, time slows down. It knows better.
