I’m experiencing a lot of firsts, and most of them revolve around Connor. Allen and Carolyn let me borrow him regularly. I call it getting my “Connor fix” for the day. I just must hold the little guy.

Tonight, Allen and I were left with Connor while Pam and Carolyn were out getting Carolyn some new shoes. He began getting fussy, so I picked him up and held him. But he didn’t stop. I asked Allen what I should do to calm him, and he said, “I don’t know.” Allen is real good with Conner. But I guess babies are not an exact science.

So I stood and bobbed up and down, like I’ve seen mothers do. I felt like a total idiot. I kept my bob to a minimum, trying to retain some dignity, but enough motion so that it counted for something. And gradually, Connor settled down. And then, suddenly, magically, he was asleep. In my arms. His head pressed into my shoulder. I couldn’t believe it. I felt like I had just scaled Mount Everest, such was my sense of accomplishment. And I didn’t want to ever let that moment stop.

I eventually sat back down on the couch, with Connor laying on my chest, and he slept soundly, right there, for a good hour. Maybe more. No way did I want to put him down. When he began stirring, I cradled him in my arms, and he went back to sleep. Thus did we dance for two hours tonight, until I finally gave the sleeping tot to Allen.

This is all run-of-the-mill stuff for most people, who’ve either had babies or been around babies. For me, this is all quite new.

Here are some more photos:

• Allen, Carolyn, and Connor.
• Pam and I with our two kids: Jordi (in yellow) and Molly.
• Connor, in his swing, gives Allen a big smile.
• Conner loves his “My First Christmas Bear.”
• Another of Connor asleep on me.