There are all kinds of rules about flying the American flag. I thought my generation just didn’t get the memo. Or school budget cutbacks killed the Flag 101 course.

• When displayed at night, the flag must be properly illuminated.
• When displayed over the middle of the street, the flag should be suspended vertically.
• When displayed with another flag, that flag should be on the US flag’s right (meaning the viewer’s left).
• When flown at half-staff, the flag should be hoisted to the top for an instant, then lowered halfway.
• When placed over a casket, the blue square should be over the dead person’s left shoulder.
• The flag should never touch anything beneath it (so don’t use it as a floor or table covering).
• Nothing should ever be attached to the flag–any mark, insignia, letter, word, design, etc.
• The flag should never be used as wearing apparel (like Kid Rock did at the 2004 Super Bowl).
• If you fly the US flag at half-staff, all other flags flown with it (state flags, Christian flag(?)) should be at half-staff.
• When a flag needs to be replaced, you should burn it. There is a whole flag burning ceremony.

John McCain and George Bush have both publicly autographed flags. Violation!

George and Laura Bush stood on a carpet of the American flag at Ground Zero. Violation!

The other day, Dad mentioned that when we lived in Pixley, Calif., a flag flew outside the church, but didn’t have a light shining on it. There was plenty of other light around the church, but nothing shining specifically on the flag. One morning, Dad found the flag taken down and neatly folded up. He figured some veteran, who knew the rule, did that as a subtle hint.

Pam and I have a very nice all-weather flag hanging on a very nice pole outside our front door. Today we came into compliance with the illumination rule. A ground light now illuminates the flag at night. It’s not a strong light, but hey, we’re legal and conscientious.