Macs, Intel, Viruses, and Feeling Included

On Tuesday night, as I rested between ping pong matches (yes, it’s necessary to rest), Gary told me he was having a hard day. Gary, who does computer trouble-shooting for the school system, said he got a new PC at home and taught his wife how to use it. The problem, he explained with a grimace, is that she’s far from computer savvy. He came home to find the new computer in some kind of infinite rebooting loop, which required all of his computer prowess to fix. Fixing his wife’s non-computer savvy would prove more difficult.

I then told Gary that I couldn’t relate, because I’m a Mac user, to which he said, “My condolences.” I told him that we primitives don’t know anything about infinite rebooting loops; the very concept is absent from our universe. Typical interaction between PC and Mac users.

Apple has begun using Intel chips in Macs. I told Gary that we Mac users have always felt left out, because we don’t get the viruses which the PC world takes for granted. At social gatherings, PC guys discuss pitched battles with invasive viruses and having their DSL connections hijacked, and exhilarating stuff like that which can inspire pack grunting. Meanwhile, we Mac users stand idly by, bearing nothing to contribute to the conversation. We twiddle our thumbs, feeling excluded. It’s not a good feeling. How we have desperately yearned to experience the worms and viruses which everyone else experiences in such resplendently diverse glory.

Now, with Intel chips in our computers, we Mac users can actually boot our Macs using Windows XP, which is, of course, an unimaginable dream come true. And in the process, we could potentially become privy to the viruses which the rest of the world has come to enjoy and appreciate, not to mention the crashed networks, missing drivers, and so much more which colors that side of the fence with multi-hued greenery. The very thought of the adventures to come makes me salivate all over my keyboard. Excuse me while I locate a towel.

Of course, it won’t work that way. We may bring the viruses to our computers, but they won’t do anything sinister. They’ll be impotent. And so, we remain non-combatants, relegated to the rear-guard of the infection wars. But at least this gave me a talking point with Gary. I don’t feel as excluded as I did before.

By the way, I love the new “Get a Mac” ad series from Apple. There are six ads. I’ve only seen one on TV, but all can be viewed onscreen with Quicktime or downloaded. I especially like the one on viruses.

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