Monthly Archives: April 2006

What I Really Think About Daylight Savings

A few weeks ago, Indiana climbed aboard the Daylight Savings Time train. We resisted it for decades, despite all kinds of arguments that it would be a good thing. But finally, the idea got through the legislature, and at the beginning of April, Hoosiers had to learn how to change their clocks.

We’re supposed to not like it. We’re supposed to gripe about it, just like we gripe about class basketball.

But I must admit–I like it. Today I mowed my yard late in the day, and didn’t finish until 8:30 pm–but it was still light out. That was nice.

And our cats love it. They love being outside in the grass, but know that when it gets dark, we won’t let them out. So now, when we come home at the end of the day, there is an extra hour of daylight they can claim as outside time.

So I, a Hoosier, a person who hates to change, admits that this change works well for me. Sorry.

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Waving of the Palms

Palm Sunday 2006
Today was Palm Sunday, of course. Someone acquired a whole bunch of palm fronds, which we laid around the sanctuary and stuck in chairs. When we sang “Hosanna,” we invited (or drafted) people to come join the worship team in waving the palms in the air, and people throughout the pews also waving them. This was especially cool during the more crowded second service. As I stood at the keyboard, I looked at my camera sitting on the front pew, and wished I could pick it up and snap a shot or two. But alas, I couldn’t.

But during our closing song, Chris Kuntz, our worship leader, invited people to wave the palms again as we sang “All Hail the Power of Jesus Name” (the contemporary, Maranatha version). I dropped out during the second verse to grab my camera and snapped a half-dozen photos. Some turned out nice.

It was just cool to watch. Real cool.

I muffed “All Hail” during the first service. The song has a key change after the bridge, as you go into the third verse. But I started the song in the ending key. The guitarists, of course, recognized it. Tim was standing right in front of me. As we sang the first verse, I said to Tim “I started in the wrong key,” and he nodded. I looked at Terry, the other guitarist, standing on the other side of the sanctuary. He just rolled his eyes.

As we entered the bridge, I muttered to Tim, “Here comes a train wreck.” Because I had no idea what key this was supposed to transition into. Fortunately Chris, who until now I didn’t realize had perfect pitch, realized we were singing in the wrong key, and he didn’t make a key change. As the song concluded, I wiped my brow. “Phew! Disaster averted!”

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Just Blurt it Out

There are many reasons that I consider George Bush the worst president of my lifetime. But though I’ve made occasional forays into criticizing GW, I’ve checked my swing many times. While this blog is a trite personal diversion, I’m always conscious of my role as my denomination’s Communications Director, and likewise highly conscious of the fact that United Brethren churches are chiefly populated by conservative Republicans, the type of people who watch Fox News and idolize George and Laura. I don’t want my personal rantings to cause collateral damage to the Bishop, the Church as a whole, or my own official role.

And yet, “Whatever” is designed for my own amusement, and for the past several years, I’ve been highly dis-amused by the shenanigans of GW’s administration, which I strongly believe not only dishonor our country among the nations, but displease God.

So, should I vent? Or should I do what’s needed to be politically correct within my occupational context?

Sometimes I feel like Alan Greenspan, the Fed chief, when he would appear before Congressional committees and speak at length while saying absolutely nothing of consequence, lest he disturb the markets. And having made that comparison, it’s obvious that I take myself way too seriously.

So, I’m going to begin venting. Not because I think it’ll positively affect the earth’s rotation or anything, but because I feel the US needs some evangelical Christian voices, however inconsequential, to buck the Republican rubber-stamping approach we’ve had toward politics. And I realize that a good share of the multitudes of bored people who read this blog won’t be amused.

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Domain Name Trivia

Here’s a fascinating page which talks about domain names. I know–probably boring stuff to most people. But to me, with about 20 names registered with Network Solutions (3 for church, 5 personal, 14 for work), it’s pretty fascinating. For instance:

  • There are 676 possible two-letter sequences ending in .com, and all are taken. So are all 17,576 of the three-letter combinations. The United Brethren domain is a two-letter domain (ub.org), but with the .org extension. However, we’re still pretty lucky to have registered it early.
  • Of the 467,000 four-letter domain possibilities, nearly 98,000 are still available. For now. The writer says, “Choose one, and then manufacture a ridiculous backronym to explain it.” Like 7RG8.com, or U3JZ.com.
  • The average domain name is 11 letters long.
  • The maximum-allowed length is 63 characters. There are 538 domains of that length, including one with 63 Zs. followed by .com.
  • The US Census Bureau lists 1219 male names, and all of them are registered. But not all of the 2841 female names are registered. All of the top 10,000 family names are registered.

Like I said, it’s interesting to me.

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UCLA Falls Down, Indiana Springs Forward

I’m embarrased by UCLA’s performance last night. Hey, it’s commendable that they got to the final, considering that 62 other teams didn’t make it that far. But I wish they could have put up a little more of a fight. Besides, I can’t stand any of the Florida schools. Miami, Florida, Florida State–a pox on them and their children! On their pets, too!

It was wierd last night getting home around 7:30, and it was still plenty light outside. Indiana has now joined the world of the biennial time-changers. On Sunday, we did the spring-forward thing. I guess there is some huge, utterly compelling benefit that Indiana will reap as a result of changing millions of clocks. Proponents say it’ll draw business to Indiana. Right. As if our majestic mountains and rolling valleys aren’t enough of a lure.

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Thoughts on the F Word and Presidential Pardons

If a guy in your church regularly drops the F bomb, is he regarded as a spiritual man? Would you put him on the church board? Make him an elder? Give him a Sunday school class to teach? I don’t want to create a spiritual litmus test based on verbal habits. But the Bible does talk about controlling your tongue, and in our society, using the F word is not considered a redeeming social quality, and certainly not descriptive of a man of God.

Matthew 15:18 talks about a man being defiled by what comes out of his mouth, and says that what comes out of the mouth is actually coming from the heart. David connected the two when he told God, “Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O Lord.”

In my church, a person who drops F bombs wouldn’t be placed in any position of leadership, and wouldn’t be considered a spiritual example. Likewise with other forms of what would be considered profanity, vulgarity, cussing, or however you want to describe it. I suspect the same is true in your church. Almost seems like a biblical no-brainer, doesn’t it?

So why do we excuse it in our presidents? G. W. controls his tongue in public, but is known to use the F word in staff meetings and smaller circles. The same has been true of every president during my lifetime, except for Jimmy Carter. Everyone since Nixon has known how to wield religious language for public consumption. GW certainly has that down. When he can’t think of anything else to say, he throws out something that will earn points with grassroots religious people. (“Who is your favorite philosopher?” “Jesus.”) We evangelicals talk about him as a man of sincere faith, the same way evangelicals used to talk about Nixon and Reagan and GHWB being such fine, outstanding, committed Christians who hob-nobbed with Billy Graham. And yet, when we read accounts of GW using the F word, we excuse it for some reason just as we excused it with all of his predecessors. Whereas we would never excuse it for a person in our local church.

I don’t doubt that GW, at one point, had a life-changing religious experience. But past spiritual vitality is not proof of present spiritual vitality. Once you learn the Christian lingo, you don’t forget it, especially if you’re a politician. You can grow spiritually cold, but still sling religious terminology around to maintain the illusion of ongoing spirituality. We all know how easy it is to fool people. I’m not saying that’s the case with GW. But the Bible clearly states that what emerges from the mouth is evidence of what is in the heart. Nobody at Anchor who is on top of his game spiritually uses the F word. So I’m not inclined to give GW a pass, even if he is the President. Why should the President be held to a lower standard? Should be just the opposite.

Okay, now I’ve really really offended my evangelical friends.

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Obsessive TV Watching in the Pews

It’s interesting how much, at church, we talk about TV shows. Today I talked with Jon about “Battlestar Galactica”‘s finale, which took a highly unexpected twist and leaves us wondering where the show will head next. Joe and Jon and Rob and I talked about “Lost,” which is also popular among the worship team members (at practice on Thursday night, we often debrief about the previous night’s episode). There was some talk about “American Idol,” and, of course, about the NCAA playoffs (go UCLA!). I talked with Terry and Joe and Tim about “24.” Terry and Joe (father and son) are watching the first four seasons on DVD, having never watched them live; they are now well into the 4th season. Meanwhile, Tim and I are engrossed in season 5.

I have this idea for “24.” Jack Bauer has amazing bladder control. In five years, he has never once stopped, amidst that day’s frenetic issues with assassins and terrorists and otherwise deeply evil guys, to relieve himself. And yet–hey, everyone has to go to the bathroom now and then. Even a superman like Jack, who no doubt received top-level CIA training in Advanced Bladder Control. So in an upcoming episode, with some catastrophe looming, I’d like to see Jack say, “Hey, guys, you take care of this one. I really need to go to the bathroom.” Then he picks up a novel, something you wouldn’t expect from Jack–a chick book by Anne Tyler or Sue Miller, or anything from the Oprah Book Club–and heads into the men’s room. And in the final shot, where they show four plot threads in split-screen view, one of the shots would be of the men’s room door.

I think that’d be great.

Back to our congregational obsession with TV. Is that good, bad, or what? I don’t know. Less redeeming than talking about what we discovered in our personal devotions, obviously. It probably wasn’t all that different for my parents’ generation, the first TV generation. They just had only three channels’ worth of shows to talk about (which means there was a greater chance of common viewing habits). It is kinda fun to talk about, to compare notes on that week’s shows. But is it healthy? Beats me.

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